PARENTS BANNED HER FROM SEEING BOYFRIEND

Dear Jellybean,

I have a problem with my parents. They won't let me go out with my boyfriend anymore because someone that works at my school called my mother telling her about my boyfriend like he's had the cops as his house before, he and his friends do drugs like weed. Now I can't can't see him on the weekends anymore. I can only see him during school. We can talk on the phone and they will let me go to Kennywood with him like we planned out, but other than that I cannot see him. They couldn't care less if my boyfriend did drugs, they just don't want me involved with it, and they don't want me to start doing drugs then getting high and ending up pregnant. I'm 15 years old. Do you have any suggestions for me to get my parents to let me see my boyfriend again? PLEASE help me. I really love my boyfriend and I want to see him again.
-Kelly

Dear Kelly,

To be honest with you, I think your parents are pretty smart. They know that the more someone is around drugs, the more likely it is that person will try drugs. I know your boyfriend didn't do drugs right in front of you, but the fact that you accepted someone who does drugs into your life has given your parents a good scare. They want to you succeed in life, to be a happy person without addictions and to accomplish great things at school and in your career someday. If you get involved in drugs, you could blow your whole future. Your parents obviously put a lot of trust in you, and they know you're a good girl, or they wouldn't let you go to Kennywood with him, they'd say you can never see him again - and they might even make you switch schools. But they're not being that extreme, they're just trying to put some distance between you and your BF. The point is, your folks aren't trying to be mean, they are just watching out for you, because you are their special treasure and I'm sure it is painful for them to think of you going down the wrong path in life. So what are you supposed to do about all this?

I think your boyfriend has proved to everyone that he cannot be trusted. He has messed with drugs, which was a stupid choice to make, no matter how smart and nice a guy he is. Now everyone knows him as a druggie guy who is a bad influence. It will be up to him to prove to everybody that he can change and become a good person again, who is drug-free and focused on a clean and sober future. Talk to your parents, and ask them what your boyfriend can do in order to prove to them that he has reformed. They might say "nothing, once a bad seed always a bad seed" - but I don't think they will, because they sound like reasonable people from what you have told me. Try to get your folks to tell you what will prove to them that your BF is good enough for you to date again. Maybe that's seeing him get a certain grade level in all his classes, or a certificate from a doctor that he hasn't done drugs for a certain period of time, or assurances from his parents that he has stopped. Have the conversation with your parents, and while you're at it, reassure them that you are not interested in doing drugs, because you want to have a great life, just like they want for you. Good luck with everything.