Dear Jellybean,
Ok, so here's the deal. Me and my friend's best friend are dating. When we first started out, I asked her of she was ok with that and she said yeah. But now, whenever me and him are together around her, she starts hanging all over him. I mean, I know they've been best friends since they were little, but does that give her the right to hang all over him? I talked 2 her about it, but she claims its just the way she acts around him. She also admitted 2 having a crush on him a couple years ago. She claims she got over it, but i dunno. Any advice? PLZ Help
-Jealous and Suspicious
Dear Jealous and Suspicious,
Whether or not your friend meant it at the time, she did say she was okay with you dating her guy friend. It was decent of you to ask her, and she gave you the green light, so you should be cooking with gas, right? So it's too bad she's acting flirty with him now and causing problems.
What I think is, you have to examine the causes of your jealousy, and work on making that better for yourself. So your friend is flirting with your guy, and that's not the best thing she could do, even if it is how she used to act with him. But probably, you can't do much about that. It's just how she has chosen to handle this situation.
What you have to ask yourself now is, if she tries to make a serious move for your boyfriend, are you secretly scared he'll choose her instead of you? If you really trust him, and you don't think that's the case, then it's not an issue. When she flirts, you can just roll your eyes, realize she's acting badly, and know that at the end of the day, you're the one with a boyfriend.
But if you are worried that your guy might like your friend, that's another issue. Then you have to think about if that's really true (in which case, is he really that great a boyfriend, or do you two just need more time to make things solid?) or if you need to build your confidence enough to believe that a guy could really like you better than her.
