BFF HAS LOW SELF-ESTEEM

Dear Jellybean,

hey! okay heres the thing, my best friend in the whole wide world has the lowest self esteem. She keeps thinking that she isnt good enough for anything. I want to help her, but no matter how i try she keeps saying shes not good enough. I dont know what to do. HELP!!!!
-A good friend?

Dear Good Friend,

It’s nice that you want to help your friend. You might want to send her a link to the Myjellybean.com article "Love You!" (click here), which is meant to be a self-esteem booster.

Otherwise, what you can do is, remind your friend that she is good enough for you - and that you have good taste. Tell her you wouldn't be friends with her, unless you saw something special in her. Take the time to remind her what you find awesome about her, and be specific. It sounds like your friend needs to hear it.

You can tell your friend that she needs to stop putting herself down because she is indeed a beautiful person inside and out, and that if she ever becomes down about herself she can come to you no matter what is bothering her. But also tell her you can't compliment her all the time, if she doesn't believe what you say anyway. She has to start saying those things to herself, and believing them. It's awesome if you can let her know she can confide in you when she has problems. But in the end, it's up to your friend to stop getting down on herself and turn herself around.

It's possible that your friend is really depressed, and needs more help than her friends can give. If you're worried that's the case, suggest to her that she talk to her folks about seeing a counselor or a psychologist, or pay a visit to the school guidance counselor. She could also call one of the free teen hotlines - click here for a page with phone numbers. Depression is nothing to be embarrassed about, and it can be treated. Good luck to your friend. She's lucky to have a supportive person like you in her corner.